It’s Monday! Woo-hoo! And guess who still hasn’t been getting any sleep???? Well, at least I managed to make some progress on outlining one of several WIPs this morning—after lying on the couch for an hour trying to will myself back to sleep (and looking at strange music videos with the volume muted). Ah. The perks of waking up at 3 a.m. You should try it, folks:)
So what’s on my mind today? Well, in celebration of No Sleep Mondays (#NSM), I’d like to talk about pushy people online (because when you’re sleep deprived like yours truly, you’re eleven out of ten times more likely to tell a “pushy” person where to stick it).
Here’s the scenario:
I get quite a few book review requests. As I have stated numerous times on this blog, I am not an official book reviewer, per se. I repeat: Quanie is not an official book reviewer.
Don’t believe me? Here’s the proof:
Book Reviewer (from Quanie’s dictionary): noun. Someone who loves to read books, oftentimes with a critical eye. Often solicits authors to submit books for consideration because they have time to read books critically, post a review, and repeat the process as many times as necessary.
Quanie: noun (although can sometimes double as an adjective). Hasn’t been able to read anything since the arrival of Le Munchkin a year and a half ago. Tries to read books, especially by authors she meets online, but has come to the conclusion that she may not get to read another book all the way through until Le Munchkin is in kindergarten. But she’s not a quitter and will continue to try!
So anyway, I get a lot of book review requests, but one request in particular really took the cake. The exchange went something like this:
*Names have been changed to protect the pushy person’s identity*
Cleophis Wonderbutt: Hey, Quanie! Really love your blog! I was wondering: I have a book I’d like you to review. It’s about 150,000 words, mystery, suspense, women’s fiction with a tad bit of paranormal. Oh; and it’s a comedy, too! I have attached the novel as a word document, but I’d be happy to send you a PDF file if you prefer. I’ve also attached a non disclosure agreement, as I am very weary about this copyright thing.
My apologies in advance for the typos in the manuscript, lol!
Quanie: Cleophis, congratulations on finishing your novel! I know how excited you must be, but I actually don’t review books. Have you tried some of the groups on Goodreads or Googling reviewers in your genre(s) and querying them directly?
Best of luck to you!
Cleophis: Quanie, thank you for your response, dear! I understand that you are not reviewing books, but you will not regret this! Can you please please please review my book and post your review on Amazon and Goodreads within the week? I’m on a deadline. Thx. Oh; and I really loved The New Mrs. Collins! Can you please send a copy to my mother?
*Bangs head against keyboard*
You guys, I embellished a bit here, but the exchange above is not too far off from the actual correspondence between me and this author. No wonder I can’t get any sleep! As someone who sends out quite a few book review requests myself, I understand wanting exposure just as much as the next author, but what happened to the days when we took no for an answer, said to ourselves, “When one door closes a window opens somewhere else,” and kept it moving? When does persistence evolve into something else? Like annoyance? Or a nice, ice cold 24 ounce can of whup ass????
Of course, this author isn’t the only pushy person I’ve come across online (I’m looking at you, spammer who keeps sending me an invoice for web services despite the fact that I never hired you), but they had a certain je ne sais quois that really fried my grits. The nerve!
Okay, guys, sorry about the rant! What about others? Even if you haven’t had to deal with overly persistent authors who can’t take no for an answer, what types of pushy people have you dealt with, online or in person? Used car salesmen? Mattress salesmen?
Let’s talk about it!